In the 11th episode of ‘How I Met Your Mother’ Season 6, Barney Stinson mentioned about <The Mermaid Theory> whereby girls are seen as manatees until one day when you’ve spent long enough time with her, she’ll transform into a mermaid… and he further eleborated on his blog :
“No matter how hot or unhot a woman is, eventually you will want to sleep with her. The time it takes for this process to occur is the chick’s “Mermaid Clock.” It starts the first time you lay eyes on a chick and stops ticking the instant you want to get your jam on.”
So that’s the theory from the modern guys.
On the other hand, most girls usually follow <Ladder Theory> whereby guys are placed on this “bi-ladderal” system – either the Good Ladder or the Friends Ladder – if guys from the friends ladder try to jump over to the good ladder, and fails – usually they fall into the abyss between these 2 ladders. (which I guarantee most of those cases do fail.) The transition tends to be impossible once the label is permanent.
I had a chat with a male friend of mine who asked if there’s ever a chance for guys who fall under ‘friends zone’ to be seen as a potential mate, and how to avoid being classified into the ‘friends’ zone before any potential feelings develop. As a girl, I admit that I do have these categories in my mind as well…or rather, everyone usually falls into friends zone for me – which makes things really awkward when someone suggests any interest in me romantically.
Then again, I believe that it takes awhile for the ‘Friends’ label to be fixed and never be turned into ‘mermaid’ aka developing interest/wanting a relationship with that person- but that’s just me.
Time for discussion :
1) How do you avoid being classified to the Friends Ladder ?
2) Do you believe in The Mermaid Theory ? If no, why not ?
I have heard about the friends/lovers circle thing and how it’s possible for a lover to jump into friend, but rarely for friend to lover.
Guys don’t have this problem. If anything I dare say most of us look at all girls as prospective lovers.
It’s really a evolutionary thing I feel, so I won’t go too much into that.
So to avoid being classified into the friend’s ladder, don’t start off as friends! Position yourself as someone who wants to be more. That way you won’t be automatically classified as a friend..
Mermaid Theory:
I never thought about it before, but yes, this probably makes sense.
Once again, evolutionary thingy – why guys want to get in bed with many girls, and why girls fall for the badass guys.
That’s why sometimes I find it hard to believe that a guy can be platonic friends with a girl. They’ve probably thought about her in that way a few times, but they just refuse to admit it. (or probably for the sake of friendship totally ignore it when it does come up).
Aaron Peng´s last [type] ..The end of the 40 days no meat fast – 6 kg lost – Lessons learnt -
Friends ladder, totally true. How to avoid? On top of these two factors of physical and mental. there is actually this 3rd factor which plays a very big part IMHO. – Time. Mental attraction plays a very big part for a relationship to start. There is a time or “expiry” for this mental attraction, and once the mental attraction goes over the limit, BOOM! you fall into the friend ladder. How to know when is the right time? it’s like cooking I suppose, every dish has a different timing and it takes some experience for you to know the cooking time of each type of food. Either 1 of the party has to make it obvious that there is certain amount of romantic attraction in the r/s to buy time else it will just keep moving forward into the friend zone, and yes, there is no return. It’s just too awkward to be couple once you guys are good friends for too long a period of time. It feels like seeing your siblings naked or having an incest. =X
Mermaid Theory, Funny enough it works the other way for me. I have many female friends who I find them pretty before I really know them. ( like through other friend’s fb acct, or some how like met them before once or maybe the tiny thumbnail off twitter account) I would not say I find them unattractive after knowing them but just the feeling of meeting a “hot girl” is no longer around. Maybe that’s why I have many close female friends but just 1 girlfriend till now since *cough* 2002. = )
@smithankyou =) Thanks for sharing oh wise one ! We should totally do a Mars Vs Venus column together..hahaha
[...] either harbor or later develop sexual feelings towards her. It is what is famously known as the Mermaid Theory. The Bro Code might be in our DNA. Men might actually be biologically wiredto friendzone their [...]