Tagged with How I Met Your Mother

The Onslaught on the Singles

I am quite lucky to have parents who are never pressurizing me to find someone in my life, in fact, they have always been telling me there’s no rush to get married and it’s better not to have kids unless I am able to financially support the entire family or really love kids that much (which fortunately over the years, I have discovered I don’t really want children, if possible) So I guess the only “external pressure” is watching my friends getting married one by one or being in a long term relationship that lasts more than 5 years, and of course nosy acquaintances who will question why am I not in a relationship or asking me to stop studying and settle down asap.

I won’t deny that being single during special occasions and stuff like parties and gatherings makes me feel extra lonely and your mind will start to wonder (a) “What is wrong with me that nobody wants to be with me?” (b) “Why didn’t the (previous) relationship last? was it my fault? Le sigh, gotta be it.” (c) “Maybe they are right, I should just settle down like everyone else. Perhaps just find a random dude who is decent I guess.” – Thank god these thoughts are temporary, else I’ll be in deep trouble right now! haha

“We gotta wait for the real thing, no matter how tough it gets.”

- Ted Mosby, HIMYM S07E11

So to all the well-meaning aunties and uncles and ‘kaypoh’ (nosy in Singlish) friends who take advantage of this festive season to probe into others’ personal lives. There are people who are actually satisfied with how they are living their lives right now without someone in their lives. Sure, we are definitely not getting any younger but hell, says who it is a girl’s “dream/mission” to be settle down, find the love of her life (or not) and have kids before 30 years old? Says who studying too much is too much? (what is too much anyways? learning is never ending!) Says who it is a must during Chinese New Year to ask these awkward questions to annoy the unmarried youngsters like us? Jeez.  Struggle

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With Valentine’s Day coming, I guess most singles out there are having a hard time during the CNY visiting. (Thank God I don’t have to do any! haha) The next time someone asks me “the question”, I’ll reply exactly like in the picture above – “I want a guy like Ted who’ll love me like Marshall and make me laugh like Barney.” Don’t get the reference? Go watch all 8 seasons of How I Met Your Mother before you ask me the question again!   Talk to the Hand

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So, pre-nup?

Was another not-quite funny HIMYM episode, guess the writers had to put in the serious stuff and iron some details out before the good old humor comes back. Though I laughed alil over Lily’s “Snap, Crackle and Pop” (which are actually the cereal Rice Krispies’s mascots by the way!)

So we know from this episode that one of the couples were about to break up after the whole pre-nup incident between Barney and Quinn. I myself feel that pre-nup is yet another thing that humans came up with to complicate life/relationships. I liked how Arthur stopped the arguments between the couples with a relatively good line.

Arthur: “Love is trusting someone enough to tell them what’s really bothering you.”

Though in reality, we often see couples telling white lies or half-truths because most of the time, the excuse/reason is to not hurt the other person. Is knowing too much a bad thing? Perhaps. Is being totally honest a bad thing? Perhaps. Based on my own experiences, I certainly have trust issues in most of my relationships..I guess I’d say it is wiser to keep certain things to yourself than to blabber everything out or what exactly is bothering you because most of the time the other person does not see eye to eye with you and often ends up in a boo-boo or regrets. So how much is good enough? I have no idea too. However, I also feel that if you can’t be entirely honest with the person you are spending the rest of your life with – something is wrong somewhere huh?

So with that, I’ll end with Barney’s awesome quote…and the great closing song to the episode (the team is doing well on picking great songs..hur)

Barney: “I found out I’ll never trust someone enough to get married and that’s fine. My single life is and always will be legen…wait for it.dary!”

Damien Jurado – Museum of Flight

Falling to the ground
I was anxious to be found
You can always go home
To the safety of your cloud

Don’t let go
I need you to hang around
I am so broke
And foolishly in love

I turned around to love revealing
What did I learn, it’s not that easy
When you get burned and go on burning light

Falling into sound
Is a less defeating path
One day we will go home
To the safety of our clouds

Don’t let go
I need you to hang around
I’m so broke
And foolishly in love

I turned around, my life was changing
What did I learn, it’s not that easy
When you get burned and go on burning light

Don’t let go
I need you to hang around
I’m so broke
And foolishly in love

I turned around, my life was changing
What did I learn, it’s not that easy
When you get burned and go on burning light

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A Change Of Heart

Couldn’t resist putting this picture of Marshall up – he looks so funny with the mustache! (credit tvfanatic)

In Season 6 Episode 18 of ‘How I Met Your Mother’, we see that Barney starts to have feelings for Nora and worries that there’s something wrong with his heart. It was probably not the best episode, or even possibly being one of the worst episode in HIMYM history, with the lame recurring jokes and weak plot. However, I adore the start of the show with Ted narrating that one never knows what’s going on with one’s heart and it was a heartfelt story about Barney falling in love with Nora – or as how he puts it ‘I want to be confused with you.’

People spend so much time being confused about love. There do not seem to be any rules of what to do when you meet that special someone or even if you have not met him/her. And when you do meet that special someone, you most often choose to deny the feelings as you’re afraid of changes or what is to come. That’s a hard truth because no one wants to admit that they have a ‘problem’ – people tend to ignore such matters and let the confusion continues. Let’s just say that both parties suffer in the end.

Love should not be confusing. Of course, it is bound to have problems that will arise in a relationship, be it just dating or in a marriage. But for it to work, you can’t be confused over 50% of the time as when a relationship becomes too confusing – it is time to take a step back and work things out together or leave it. Unfortunately, there are more cowards out there leaving their relationships instead of working things out together. Broken hearts can be found everywhere – just because one (or both parties) was/were confused at certain points of a relationship. A change of heart, with a whole new meaning?

Honestly, the overwhelming fear that comes with desire to be with someone special resonated deeply with me.  However, the emotional undercurrents are worlds apart. -cues emo background song- (lol) On a lighter note, I thought the subplot with Robin’s new boyfriend ‘Scooby’ was quite amusing, reminded me of others used to tell me that I need a dog in my life and not a boyfriend too ! (I kinda agree with that now. Haha!)

Looking forward to see the finale despite this is the last season of ‘How I Met Your Mother’. Until then, I hope you all find that someone special to be confused with.

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Last Words ?

In the last episode of How I Met Your Mother (S06E13), the bad news came unexpectedly. This week (S06E14) is somewhat like an extended version of the episode whereby Marshall’s dad’s funeral took place. I have to say, it was a really bad episode – quite a letdown in fact if it acts as last week’s buildup. It was unfunny humor of how Ted and Barney tried to cheer Marshall up with videos – but  to no avail. (Great keyword search example by the way. haha)

The only thing that saved the show this week was Jason Segel aka Marshall (once again). I liked his little speech on his dad and the significance of last words.

Marshall:

You guys don’t get it, okay? None of you do. My dad was my hero. And he was my teacher. And he was my best friend. He always came through for me, and now he’s just gone. And what am I left with?

Thanks a lot God, thank you. You took my father. The greatest man that I have ever known, and you whipped him off this Earth, way too young. And he’ll never get to meet our kids, Lily. But we’ve got this voicemail. Thank you so much for the voicemail, it’s a great comfort. Because whenever I’m starting to feel lonely, or sad, or maybe a little bit cheated, at least I’ve got the sound of his pocket to console me. How is this fair? You’ve got an entire human life, and it just ends for no reason. And what are we left with?

I really felt for him at that moment because I share a strong bond with my Dad personally – and every day I fear that this would happen to me. What would his last word to me be ? Or in any case, what if I am the one who leave the world first ? What would my last word be? What do you want others to remember before you take your last breath? Ok, morbid moment there.

The end of the show foreshadows the next episode is probably having Barney to meet his real father. Might just be another emotional episode…gosh, now I really wish the show can just focus on finding Ted’s wife and save me the tear jerking scenes.

It’s been awhile since I last blogged but there’s just so much to do lately since school has started for almost a month now! Thanks for understanding and please continue reading while I pick up my blogging momentum again… like what Marshall said, “I really, really, love you guys…..Now I’m gonna go drop a deuce.”

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2010 in Moving Images

TV has taken my life over like an imperialistic regime, let’s just say I spent at least 8 hours in a week catching up on TV shows. Let’s see some of my personal favorites of this year.

1) How I Met Your Mother – This comedy is like a huge mystery to us fans – WHO IS TED’S WIFE ?! This season has its basic humor and a little surrealism to elevate it above the past seasons. New schticks and the usual awesome Barneyism. Looking forward to the end to find out  (I) who is the wife ? (II) will Robin and Barney end up together eventually ? (III) Will Lily and Marshall have tons of kids? – but not quite looking forward to the last episode as well since this is apparently the last season.

2) The Big Bang Theory – Needless to say, these 4 brainiacs are as adorable as ever since the past 3 seasons. Interesting addition to the group is Amy Farrah Fowler, a girl who is a friend, but not Sheldon’s ‘girlfriend’. I love how she’s the female version of Sheldon. Sadly I find that Leonard’s story is dying down alil but always good to see Raj and Howard getting more lines. Will be interesting to see how Amy and Sheldon gets into a relationship and whether Leonard and Penny will get back together.

3) The Walking Dead – Rise of the zombies ! For those of you who have yet to read the comics (Neither have I, but soon!) will most likely to find it convincing, both visually and emotionally. I love how realistic and established the scenes were and it is definitely one of the most intriguing shows this season. Looking forward to more brains, guts, hearts and the undead.

4) Lie To Me – Tim Roth is really magnetic and charming as  Cal Lightman, the soul of the story. I enjoy the acting of the cast but not quite the plot which tends to digress into not-so-important details. It is still fascinating to watch how the Lightman group solves these crimes nonetheless.

5) Community – Meta-sitcom structure aside, Community has wonderfully drawn characters and remarkable cast. I totally love Abed and Troy, they never fail to bring a blast to the end of the show which happens to be the best last few minutes of each episode. Not sure how long can they last in college but will be looking forward to more.

6) Raising Hope – Very similar to ‘My Name Is Earl’ as they are both created by Greg Garcia. I like how it is built around the working class and how ‘screwed up’ life can be. Likable characters (The grandma character is hilarious), fun plot and you really can’t resist the charm of the baby. A simple yet very homely off-beat comedy.

7) Running Wilde - Slapstick humor, another way to describe the style would be ‘Arrested Development’ as it is co-created by its producers. There are flaws but some episodes get the humor. I like Kerri Russel enough to watch the show and I’m still amused by how shiny and ‘plastic’ Will Arnett’s forehead is.

8) The Office – This season has been  funny so far and probably it’s all thanks to a good cast. Steve Carell has his ways when it comes to ‘mockumentary’ – of course, clever writing helps. I am still lovin’ it.

9) Nikita – After Alias, I think this gotta be the best female kickass show on screen after a long time. Maggie Q is ever so hot and seductive in her character and I’m glad the plot gets better. A fair balance between sub-plots and action, what more can I ask for ?

10) The Vampire Diaries – Guilty pleasure. I really think Damon (on the right) is the hottest vampire around, who really gives a damn about sparkling Edward. Plot aside, gorgeous cast and excellent OST.

Not forgetting I’m always a fan of Saturday Night Live, Family Guy, singing from Glee (not so for the plot), Tower Prep (I know, it’s aired on Cartoon Network and I’m way overage for that..but Drew Van Acker is too cute to resist and anything with supernatural powers is pretty awesome to watch).  Hellcats is another guilty pleasure as the story really sucks but the cast is worth watching, based on looks that is. Criminal Minds and NCIS have been interesting but it gets just alil boring after episodes and episodes of similar predictable endings. I catch a glimpse of Parenthood once in awhile but it gets too sappy for me. Not forgetting the ‘to-catch-up-on’ list of Modern Family,Weed, Futurama and Mad Men.

Oh boy, I sure need more time for TV in 2011. Looking forward to Jan when all my shows return !

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The Mermaid Theory ?

In the 11th episode of ‘How I Met Your Mother’ Season 6, Barney Stinson mentioned about <The Mermaid Theory> whereby girls are seen as manatees until one day when you’ve spent long enough time with her, she’ll transform into a mermaid… and he further eleborated on his blog :

“No matter how hot or unhot a woman is, eventually you will want to sleep with her. The time it takes for this process to occur is the chick’s “Mermaid Clock.” It starts the first time you lay eyes on a chick and stops ticking the instant you want to get your jam on.”

So that’s the theory from the modern guys.

On the other hand, most girls usually follow <Ladder Theory> whereby guys are placed on this “bi-ladderal” system – either the Good Ladder or the Friends Ladder – if guys from the friends ladder try to jump over to the good ladder, and fails – usually they fall into the abyss between these 2 ladders. (which I guarantee most of those cases do fail.) The transition tends to be impossible once the label is permanent.

I had a chat with a male friend of mine who asked if there’s ever a chance for guys who fall under ‘friends zone’ to be seen as a potential mate, and how to avoid being classified into the ‘friends’ zone before any potential feelings develop. As a girl, I admit that I do have these categories in my mind as well…or rather, everyone usually falls into friends zone for me – which makes things really awkward when someone suggests any interest in me romantically.

Then again, I believe that it takes awhile for the ‘Friends’ label to be fixed and never be turned into ‘mermaid’ aka developing interest/wanting a relationship with that person- but that’s just me.

Time for discussion :

1) How do you avoid being classified to the Friends Ladder ?

2) Do you believe in The Mermaid Theory ? If no, why not ?

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Where’s The Poop ?

-mild spoiler alert-

While How I Met Your Mother S6E03 “Unfinished” tried hard enough to coin the phrase “where’s the poop” and tried another bro-out episode – it wasn’t exactly ‘there’ on the comical level. Somehow it was emotionally relevant to me as Robin finally learnt to let go of Don.  The other storyline of this episode revolves around Robin and her break up with her ex-boyfriend Don (from last season).

Robin’s ‘bad behavior’ of contacting her ex and unable to let go of the past , reminded Lily of her family dog’s behavior/expression after secretly pooping somewhere in the house. Ergo – “where’s the poop?”  Funny enough, going through the same phase as Robin made me realized how much your friends *actually* know you so well – to know that it’s all nothing but a lie when you said that you’re done and moved on. On a side note, I think I have really wonderful friends who are always there for me – whenever I start to feel lonely or upset, they fill in those empty spaces in my life and make sure I’m ok. It has been a rough patch for me but getting back on track =)

From this episode, the takeaway I got is that no matter how ‘insignificant’ or how ‘unimportant’ the contact is, you are giving up a part your life/memories you’ll never get back again. Like how Robin puts it “And no matter how much I try to forget that it happened, it will have never not happened.” I don’t think it is easy to let go of something that meant the world to you once. Certainly,a  little closure goes a long way. Like what Ping has told me once (and many other times) – closure begins with a capital  ’C’ that will never be closed anyways. (sometimes i don’t understand her strange logic though it makes sense at times.lol) In Robin’s words “Closure doesn’t exist.” Feelings fade, but the soft spot for the person and the feelings will always be there.

On a lighter note, best part of the show ? Robin’s threats to Don, I laughed out loud thinking of the killing and eating his face – not forgetting the facebook slut. I, for one, would never have the guts to do such a thing but hey! Always fun to be able to relate emotionally to something on TV I guess.

Unfinished dreams, unfinished relationships, unfinished deals – some others move on faster, some takes their time, in other cases (ie. me) takes forever because they are too stubborn to let go of what’s not worth holding on to anymore. Whatever it is, I believe that someday – something will trigger the idea of letting go and moving on. That ‘something’ can be another round of heartaches or a proper happy end to things – whichever it is, I think it’s time. (Suddenly I can see my friends going ‘Where’s the poop, Ingrid!’ lol)

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‘Rough Patch’ vs ‘Relationship Chicken’

Marshall: If they can’t stand each other, why don’t they end it?
Ted: Neither one wants to be first. They’re playing relationship chicken.

Disclaimer : I really love HIMYM and I am actually re-watching episodes from  the 5 seasons when I have the time to, so bear with my random quotes/reviews of the episodes. Wink

I think in ‘How I Met Your Mother” season 5, Barney and Robin’s relationship was mainly to  satirize everything couples  go through – from the mushy stage to hating each other’s guts.  The episode mentioned the term  ”relationship chicken”  which refers to the situation when neither person wants to admit the relationship isn’t working out.  On the other hand, Lily pointed out that all couples go through the ‘rough patch’ – getting used to each other and understanding each other better.

So when do you know you’re being ‘relationship chicken(s)’ or just going through a ‘rough patch’ in a relationship ? If there are times when you feel unhappy about everything – but that not exactly bad enough to kill the relationship – are you just undergoing this so-called rough patch?  Or are you playing the ‘relationship chicken’ by refusing to see the depth of the problems and brushing it off as it is probably just the usual lows that couples go through and that you should be working out over? When do you know you should hold on to that faith in the relationship ?

Sometimes you have 3rd parties who comment (be it knowing the details, or not) and you stop to ponder if they have a ‘clearer view’ over the situation than the deluded self you’re being. In chinese, there’s a saying that goes ‘當局者迷,旁觀者清’ which roughly means ‘the onlooker sees more of the game’. However, I think it is really up to the two parties involved to actually see for themselves for what they truly are. Like Barney and Robin, both of them were starting to lose themselves and you could tell that they were unhappy – even if they seem to be happy in each other’s companionship. They were better off as friends – and the breakup ? We know that it was not the end but just returning back to how it has always been for them – friends.

Would that be possible to happen in reality ? Does it really means happiness when Barney returned to say ‘Daddy’s home.’ ? (Of course in later episodes, we see that Barney isn’t entirely truly happy after returning to his old single self.)  It’s really kind of hard to tell isn’t it ?

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Love Yourself.

Future Ted : Kids, there are two basic philosophies of how to handle yourself after a breakup. Some people throw themselves into..

Robin : My career. That’s my number one focus right now. From now on, no more dating, it’s all about work.

Future Ted : .. while others throw themselves into..

Barney : Every woman in New York City ! That’s right, Barney Stinson is back on the market ! Mothers, lock up your daughters.. Daughters, lock up your MILSWANCAs !

- How I Met Your Mother “The Playbook” (S5E08) *awesome episode by the way*

Very much like Robin, I have been throwing myself into my summer part time job and planning for the upcoming term. Number one focus is to get my life back together, find and love myself again before I learn to love another. Cliche as it sounds but I think it’s the better than the latter option because 98% of the time, you end up hurting someone new because it ends up like a rebound or you don’t learn from your previous relationship mistakes but rush into someone new and continue to make the same mistakes over and over again.

“Don’t rush into any kind of relationship. Work on yourself. Feel yourself, experience yourself and love yourself. Do this first and you will soon attract that special loving other.” – Russ Von Hoelscher

Some people think that it is a good way to move on when you find someone new, in fact, I had friends offering to ‘matchmake’ or introduce guys to me (which I’ve all kindly refused).  During one of the conversations, my friend asked “So what kind of guy do you like ? Can’t really tell your ‘pattern’ apart from the fact that you always end up with ‘hot tempered/emo people’… ” (in which I laughed out loud because come to think about it, it’s quite true..hur) So she suggested that I should write a letter/blog post to remind/prevent myself from making the same ‘mistakes’ – like how Ted would write to Future Ted after each breakup…just that this will be a summary of all the past relationships (haha)

So Dear Future Ingrid,

Remember this : “When you struggle with your partner, you are struggling with yourself. Every fault you see in them touches a denied weakness in yourself. “- Deepak Chopra

If you start to feel that your partner is having expectations of you, that’s because you feel that you’re not good enough. Instead of complaining or finding faults in the other person, remember a relationship is not just something to ‘take’ from but to ‘give’ as well. If you feel that you can’t meet the ‘expectations’, don’t be afraid to voice it out and find other ways to fill that ‘gap’.  Trust is the main key to effective communication and foundation to hold any relationships.  It can’t be found in words but through actions. People will find out the truth no matter how hard you try to hide it so don’t bother telling lies or covering up. To love is to risk not to be loved in return. When you love someone, it may not mean that you have to be with that somebody. Find someone who shares the same mindset/beliefs/values. Love doesn’t count on the laughter that you shared but on the pain and tears you tried to get over with just for the sake of holding on. To understand is to listen, not what your partner says but what he/she does not say.

Actually, enough of all these nonsense. Just be yourself and love yourself. Like what Ted Mosby said :

“Kids, you may think your only choices are to swallow your anger,or throw it in someone’s face.there is a third option you can just let it go, and only when you do that is it really gone,and you can move forward.
And that, kids, was the perfect ending to a perfect love story. It just wasn’t mine.

Mine was still out there waiting for me.”

God has his plans for you. =)

So…Thank You(s) for the calls, the SMSes, the DMs, the tweets/plurks, the msn conversations, the talks, the meetups with attempts to make me feel better lately. I am truly blessed with wonderful friends around me and I really appreciate all the effort ! Sorry to cause all the worries but like the following quote :

“But in the end, the most important thing to accept is that no matter how alone you feel, how painful it may be, with the help of those around you, you’ll get through this too.” – Scrubs

Just give me the space and time too eh ? Thank You once again =)

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Life,in general.

From How I Met Your Mother (awesomest show ever)

Lily : Architecture is killing you, Ted. And it’s killing us to watch it killing you. You like that goat with the wash cloth. You want it so bad, and every time the world tried to take it away from you, you keep grabbing it. You know, it’s just the wash cloth. Why you even want it?

Ted : Because I have to be an Architect!! That’s.. that’s the plan..

Lily : Screw the plan! I planned to be a famous artist.. Marshal planned to be an environmental lawyer.. Robin planned to be a TV reporter..

Robin : I am TV reporter.. I’m on every morning , on 4 AM..

Lily : Ow, is that still on? Good for you… Barney planned to be a violinist.. You can’t design life like a building. It doesn’t work that way.. You have to live it and it will designed it self.

Ted : So.. I should just do nothing?

Lily : No… Listen what the world telling you to do… and take the leap..

I guess no one can predict how our lives would turn out to be though I believe  we can decide what we want to be. Things won’t always run as how you’ve planned. We can hang on to our dreams or just let it go. If it’s meant for us, there’s always a way that will lead us to there. Else, just carry on with life and take the leap.

Afterall, the world is constantly changing and you won’t know what will knock on your door next.

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