Hello,Twenty Eleven!
What I wish for in 2011,
for loved ones - health,wealth and love
for myself – less tears,more rest, more fun, more love.
In general, I wish there’d be more positivity in the world. It’s been a sad 2010 for us, waking up to negative news every other day. We are surrounded with such negativity that every relationship seems to be coated with this toxic. Why live in such bitter resentment? Why the lack of compassion?
Life is short. Make the most out of the time we have, with your loved ones. Tame the selfish self and be selfless.
I wish people would be more honest with themselves, that includes me. Be it in a relationship with someone or yourself. Communication is important and honesty is the foundation to all relationships. Don’t fool yourself anymore in this brand new year. Know what you want, express yourself, don’t bottle things up. Nobody is a mind reader and everyone deserves the truth. Be honest with yourself,with your feelings. Know what’s right and know when to stop. Learn to let go.
On a personal note, I am going to start detaching myself from school (not that I’m very attached/fond of it to begin with) and start focusing on my next step in life – work or masters ? Either way, I know I will enjoy it (be positive) and make the best out of it. By the end of 2011, I hope to stay in touch with people I love (yays to bff coming back!), meet new interesting people, have a healthy and balanced life, get my driving license, get a job/enroll to masters, pay back university fees debt, enjoying my part time jobs,remember to control my temper,stop falling in love with the ‘wrong’ people and love myself more, blogging for 2012.
[update : I had an awesome start to 2011, counting down with bestie and friends and a bunch of random people at a cozy pub. Wine and food with them and parents afterwards. Had fun talking on the phone with a couple of people, whatsapp-ing bff and a couple of other friends, forgetting half of the conversations when I eventually knocked out at 5am...how did you spend your first few hours of 2011? Hope everyone had fun !]
In less than 140 characters
Decided to keep things short and wrap twenty-ten in one tweet.
“Heartbroken.Loving myself more.Self discovery.Table talks treasured.Parents aging.Home alone.Final sem.New jobs.Doomie.Blogging continues.“
Back to singlehood, learning to love myself more and re-discovering the focus in life. Appreciating chats with friends and the oh so wise parents (though I refuse to admit it most of the time). Great experience to have the house to myself for a couple of months and I have to say, taking care of me myself alone and the flat is tiring yet quite an adventure. Bid farewell to year 3 and moving on to my final year as undergrad in SMU. Started coaching students and totally loving my new job. Picked up a new language (French).Gotten another part time job offer which I’m looking forward to begin in the new year. Doomie the hamster never fails to amuse me and she has no choice but stay by my side during teary lonely nights. Blogging has been fun despite the once-in-awhile-laziness but grateful to meet new friends and having opportunities such as being Top 20 World’s Coolest Intern and the chance to attend awesome events etc.
It has been an interesting year – not exactly my best but I am grateful for all the experiences I’ve had. Hopefully 2011 will be a better year (Of course it will…I am FINALLY graduating!)
Thank you for being part of my 2010 and continuous support as a friend/reader! Let’s have a blast in 2011 together!
“You live only once, but if you manage your life right, once is sufficient.” – Joe Louis
Where’s The Poop ?
-mild spoiler alert-
While How I Met Your Mother S6E03 “Unfinished” tried hard enough to coin the phrase “where’s the poop” and tried another bro-out episode – it wasn’t exactly ‘there’ on the comical level. Somehow it was emotionally relevant to me as Robin finally learnt to let go of Don. The other storyline of this episode revolves around Robin and her break up with her ex-boyfriend Don (from last season).
Robin’s ‘bad behavior’ of contacting her ex and unable to let go of the past , reminded Lily of her family dog’s behavior/expression after secretly pooping somewhere in the house. Ergo – “where’s the poop?” Funny enough, going through the same phase as Robin made me realized how much your friends *actually* know you so well – to know that it’s all nothing but a lie when you said that you’re done and moved on. On a side note, I think I have really wonderful friends who are always there for me – whenever I start to feel lonely or upset, they fill in those empty spaces in my life and make sure I’m ok. It has been a rough patch for me but getting back on track =)
From this episode, the takeaway I got is that no matter how ‘insignificant’ or how ‘unimportant’ the contact is, you are giving up a part your life/memories you’ll never get back again. Like how Robin puts it “And no matter how much I try to forget that it happened, it will have never not happened.” I don’t think it is easy to let go of something that meant the world to you once. Certainly,a little closure goes a long way. Like what Ping has told me once (and many other times) – closure begins with a capital ’C’ that will never be closed anyways. (sometimes i don’t understand her strange logic though it makes sense at times.lol) In Robin’s words “Closure doesn’t exist.” Feelings fade, but the soft spot for the person and the feelings will always be there.
On a lighter note, best part of the show ? Robin’s threats to Don, I laughed out loud thinking of the killing and eating his face – not forgetting the facebook slut. I, for one, would never have the guts to do such a thing but hey! Always fun to be able to relate emotionally to something on TV I guess.
Unfinished dreams, unfinished relationships, unfinished deals – some others move on faster, some takes their time, in other cases (ie. me) takes forever because they are too stubborn to let go of what’s not worth holding on to anymore. Whatever it is, I believe that someday – something will trigger the idea of letting go and moving on. That ‘something’ can be another round of heartaches or a proper happy end to things – whichever it is, I think it’s time. (Suddenly I can see my friends going ‘Where’s the poop, Ingrid!’ lol)
My subconscious tore me to pieces.
Ariadne: Why is it so important to dream?
Cobb: Because, in my dreams we are together.
Cobb: Dreams feel real while we’re in them. It’s only when we wake up that we realize something was actually strange.
Cobb: I miss you more than I can bear, but we had our time together. I have to let you go.
Mal: Do you know what it is to be a lover? Half of a whole?
Mal: You keep telling yourself what you know. But what do you believe? What do you feel?
Arthur: With the slightest disturbance, the dream’s going to collapse.
Cobb: Look at you. You’re just a shade, a shade of my real wife. How could I capture all your beauty, your complexity, your perfection, your imperfection, in a dream? Yes, you’re the best that I can do. But, I’m sorry, you’re just not good enough.
Cobb: She locked away a secret, deep inside herself, something she once knew to be true… but chose to forget.
Cobb: The moment’s passed. Whatever I do I can’t change this moment. I’m about to call out to them. They run away. If I’m ever going to see their faces I’ve gotta get back home. The real world.
Some lines from the movie really strikes a chord in me, just sharing with a slight re-arrangement to match how I actually feel or hear from the whole story. Guess I could relate to it in a different aspect and in general, life.
People dream of happiness, to know how it feels like to be in love, to be in control of something that makes them happy in life. Yet not many people know the true meaning behind a relationship and how little things can affect the feelings between 2 people. Sometimes people hold on, for different reasons – mainly because they knew what they had before and believe that things will change for the better. However, when this dream collapses, you wake up to reality that is harsh and you realize that you have been obsessed with your own dream and never realizing that the moment has long gone – nothing is going to change. You come back to the real world eventually because you choose to lock yourself away and try to forget, be it returning with regrets, hatred, remorse or simple happiness that you once remembered from these memories.
On a side note, Leonardo DiCaprio definitely has a home run with Inception. Ellen Page is as usual, just an eyecandy with the average sidekick acting skills, along with Joseph Gordon-Levitt. But best film I’ve watched so far this year. Christopher Nolan, impressive !
‘He’s Right.’
Bizarro: You spent the last month telling me that you finally felt like we were meant to be together.
Clark: Don’t listen to him, Lana.
Bizarro: I know what’s in his mind, Lana. He doesn’t love you like I do.
Clark: That’s a lie!
Bizarro: You’re lying, Clark – to yourself! You’re so worried about doing the right thing, you don’t even see it.
Bizarro: [to Lana] You know he won’t commit his life to you like I will. You know that.
Lana: He’s right, Clark.
Clark: What?
Lana: I’ve never been more in love than I have the past month. Only it wasn’t with you. It was with him.
Bizarro: [extends his hand to Lana] Nothing will ever come between us again.
Was watching Smallville (kinda watch some episodes here and there, on and off basis) Season 7 Ep10 ‘Persona’ whereby Bizarro was playing the role of ‘nice Clark’ to Lana who was obviously unaware and smitten. Honestly, as much as I like the idea of Lana and Clark being together, I do think Clark treats her like crap sometimes. The way he ‘protects’ her is not what I see as love but created more misunderstandings as well as problems between them. If he has been honest with her right from the start, well..I guess there won’t be so many seasons ? (haha)
I think it is rather sad for Lana to come to realise how happy and in love she was for the past month with the man she thought has changed to someone who is completely new in her life. (Obviously she chose the right guy, else there won’t be any seasons after season 7 here!) But I guess in reality, there are times whereby you wake up to reality and see the differences – be it in a relationship or friendship. Whatever you were happy with, may not be entirely true or sometimes, it may revert back to how it has been (we see at the end of the episode, the relationship between Clark and Lana worsens)
So why didn’t Lana choose Bizarro instead of Clark ? Is it out of love for Clark or was it just morally right ? (since in the show, Bizarro is the ‘bad guy’ ) Why be in love with a guy who can’t commit to you or love you as much as you see as how it’s ‘meant to be’ ?
AOTW [35] : Angels And Airwaves
Usually I’ll try to feature youtube/myspace artists but couldn’t find anyone who covered this song by Angels and Airwaves, so here’s the original artist with one of my favourite song from their 2007 I-Empire album. Catchy beat and of course the ever-catchy line of saying “everything’s magic”. Honestly, I prefer the acoustic version featured below.
What I like about Angels and Airwaves (apart from the fact that it’s lead by Blink 182′s Tom DeLonge) is that their music is inspiring and you can always feel the message behind each song. Their songs somehow grow on you after a few playbacks. Looking forward to see their film ‘Love‘, pretty sure the soundtrack will be awesome !
So down with depressing songs that remind you of the past or dwelling in relationships problems, here’s one to remind you that you still have a purpose in life, give life your best shot, live to the fullest and don’t be afraid to fall in love again.
Angels and Airwaves – Everything’s Magic
And do you ever feel like you’re alone?
And do you ever wish you’d be unknown?
I could say that i have i could say that i have
And do you ever feel things here aren’t right?
And do you ever feel the time slip by?
I can say that i have and i can say that i have
So hear this please
And watch as your heart speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything everything’s magic
Just sit back and hold on but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand and i’ll make you mine
Everything everything’s magic
And do you ever lay awake at night?
And do you ever told yourself don’t try
Don’t try to let yourself down don’t try to let yourself down
And do you ever see yourself in love?
And do you ever take a chance my love?
Because you know that i will because you know that i will
So hear this please
And watch as your heart speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything everything’s magic
Just sit back and hold on but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand and i’ll make you mine
Everything everything’s magic everything everything’s magic
So hear this please
And watch as your heart speeds up endlessly
And look for the stars as the sun goes down
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound
Everything everything’s magic
Just sit back and hold on but hold on tight
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride
And reach out your hand and i’ll make you mine
Everything everything’s magic
Love Yourself.
Future Ted : Kids, there are two basic philosophies of how to handle yourself after a breakup. Some people throw themselves into..
Robin : My career. That’s my number one focus right now. From now on, no more dating, it’s all about work.
Future Ted : .. while others throw themselves into..
Barney : Every woman in New York City ! That’s right, Barney Stinson is back on the market ! Mothers, lock up your daughters.. Daughters, lock up your MILSWANCAs !
- How I Met Your Mother “The Playbook” (S5E08) *awesome episode by the way*
Very much like Robin, I have been throwing myself into my summer part time job and planning for the upcoming term. Number one focus is to get my life back together, find and love myself again before I learn to love another. Cliche as it sounds but I think it’s the better than the latter option because 98% of the time, you end up hurting someone new because it ends up like a rebound or you don’t learn from your previous relationship mistakes but rush into someone new and continue to make the same mistakes over and over again.
“Don’t rush into any kind of relationship. Work on yourself. Feel yourself, experience yourself and love yourself. Do this first and you will soon attract that special loving other.” – Russ Von Hoelscher
Some people think that it is a good way to move on when you find someone new, in fact, I had friends offering to ‘matchmake’ or introduce guys to me (which I’ve all kindly refused). During one of the conversations, my friend asked “So what kind of guy do you like ? Can’t really tell your ‘pattern’ apart from the fact that you always end up with ‘hot tempered/emo people’… ” (in which I laughed out loud because come to think about it, it’s quite true..hur) So she suggested that I should write a letter/blog post to remind/prevent myself from making the same ‘mistakes’ – like how Ted would write to Future Ted after each breakup…just that this will be a summary of all the past relationships (haha)
So Dear Future Ingrid,
Remember this : “When you struggle with your partner, you are struggling with yourself. Every fault you see in them touches a denied weakness in yourself. “- Deepak Chopra
If you start to feel that your partner is having expectations of you, that’s because you feel that you’re not good enough. Instead of complaining or finding faults in the other person, remember a relationship is not just something to ‘take’ from but to ‘give’ as well. If you feel that you can’t meet the ‘expectations’, don’t be afraid to voice it out and find other ways to fill that ‘gap’. Trust is the main key to effective communication and foundation to hold any relationships. It can’t be found in words but through actions. People will find out the truth no matter how hard you try to hide it so don’t bother telling lies or covering up. To love is to risk not to be loved in return. When you love someone, it may not mean that you have to be with that somebody. Find someone who shares the same mindset/beliefs/values. Love doesn’t count on the laughter that you shared but on the pain and tears you tried to get over with just for the sake of holding on. To understand is to listen, not what your partner says but what he/she does not say.
Actually, enough of all these nonsense. Just be yourself and love yourself. Like what Ted Mosby said :
“Kids, you may think your only choices are to swallow your anger,or throw it in someone’s face.there is a third option you can just let it go, and only when you do that is it really gone,and you can move forward.
And that, kids, was the perfect ending to a perfect love story. It just wasn’t mine.Mine was still out there waiting for me.”
God has his plans for you. =)
So…Thank You(s) for the calls, the SMSes, the DMs, the tweets/plurks, the msn conversations, the talks, the meetups with attempts to make me feel better lately. I am truly blessed with wonderful friends around me and I really appreciate all the effort ! Sorry to cause all the worries but like the following quote :
“But in the end, the most important thing to accept is that no matter how alone you feel, how painful it may be, with the help of those around you, you’ll get through this too.” – Scrubs
Just give me the space and time too eh ? Thank You once again =)
AOTW [28] : Kina Grannis
Keeping this short since I’m having midterms and just recently came back from my Batam trip (will blog about it soon!)
Enjoyed the video and the sweet lyrics of ”Valentine’ by Kina Grannis ! Such a cute voice and lovely lyrics.
Although Valentine’s Day is wayyy over but hope you had a great one and remember, love is always in the air =)
Valentine - Kina Grannis
Love, it's a special day
We should celebrate and appreciate
That you and me found something pretty neat
And I know some say this day is arbitrary
But it's a good excuse, put our love to use
Baby, I know what to do
Baby, I...
I will love you
I'll love you, I'll love you
Love, I don't need those things
I don't need no ring
I don't need anything
But you with me
'Cause in your company
I feel happy, oh so happy and complete
And it's a good excuse, put our love to use
Baby, I know what to do
Baby, I...
I will love you
I'll love you, I'll love you
Yeah, it's a good excuse, put our love to use
Baby, I know what to do
Baby, I...
I will love you
I'll love you, I'll love you
So won't you be my honey bee?
Giving me kisses all the time
Be mine, be my Valentine
So won't you be my honey bee?
Giving sweet kisses all the time
Be mine, be my Valentine
Oh, be my Valentine
Have a ROARing Valentine !
Happy (overrated) Valentine’s Day ! Oops, I forgot the year of Tiger (my year!) kinda took away the fun for all the hallmark greeting cards and big bouquets of roses most girls are expecting. Come on, Vday shouldn’t be just for this ONE day when you’re in love.
This day is just totally over-hyped ! What’s the point of being sweet for just one day and being ‘normal’ again for the rest of the year ? It should be spontaneous and just surprise your loved ones every other time you feel like it !
If you want to give me a Valentine’s Day present, give me a gift of love that will last my lifetime !
Not forgetting, Happy Chinese New Year ! I hope couples out there made the ‘right’ decision to spend the special day with family as well. ‘Luckily’ for the boyfriend, my family decides to escape from Singapore for CNY (since we don’t have relatives here) for a short Batam getaway (my first time too! Will blog about it when I’m back!) so he doesn’t have to face that dilemma. Hur.
Have yourselves a happy holiday nonetheless =)
Overheard On The Bus : Money Over Love ?
source : publicpress
Earlier this week, I overheard this bunch of secondary school boys chatting among themselves on the bus.
The conversation as followed :
Boy A : 我长大以后，我要有多多的钱咯！(When I grow up, I want to be really rich!)
Boy B : 我要 chio bu 老婆！(I want a pretty wife!)
Boy A : 不用啦，有钱 then 你要几个老婆都可以咯 (No need, you can have as many wives as you want if you have the money.)
Boy C : 可以买 meh ? (Can I buy them?)
Boy A : 你有钱 then 她们就会来咯！(If you have money then they’ll come to you)
I’m appalled to hear such comments from the boys, especially when they are just secondary school boys (say 13-16 years old?) With that kind of mindset, I really doubt the ‘bright future’ of our society. So are you trying to say that with money, you can ‘buy’ girls ? Is money really everything ?
Another point worth mentioning is – why are girls being viewed this way ? Is it the way we behave or stereotypes of how most girls simply just dream to marry into a rich family and be ‘Tai Tai’s ?
‘When you’re in charge of money, you’re in charge of your life’. Money is certainly important and most parents would agree that you should marry someone who shares similar social class background. Rather than ‘gold-digging’, I’ll advice girls to be financially independent and pursue love instead.
At the same time, don”t be duped by romantic unrealistic dreams and regret later on in life. Smart individuals earn their own money and find your own happy love story ending at the same time…and gain that respect from the opposite gender.
Would you choose to marry ‘Money’ over ‘Love’ ?
